Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Our Journey


3 a day, really fun


Doctor Nate

The drug supply...

Suprise! We're pregnant!


During egg retreival

Nate and I always knew we wanted a big family. So after being married for only 4 short months we started trying to get pregnant. The first 6 months with no positive results were not worrying, disappointing yes, but we had been reassured a number of times that it takes the average couple at least this long. When we hit our year and a half mark we were starting to worry. I made some 'infertility' appointments with my regular OBGYN to discuss our situation. For 6 months I was on Clomid each month passing with no pregnancy, increasing my dose. Still no success, and we were broken hearted. We then decided it was time for something more invasive and tried doing artificial insemination. With two failed attempts at this, I wondered if I was ever going to be given the gift of Motherhood that I so desperately wanted. In the meantime, many tests were being done with both Nate and I, and everything came back just fine. It was time to see a specialist. We were recommended by some friends and doctors to call the U of U infertility clinic. It was the best thing we ever did. After countless meetings, appointments, and prayers we decided to move ahead with IVF (invitro fertilization.) The information was both overwhelming and exciting, not to mention the 30 pages of small print consent forms. But we were finally on our way and we couldn't wait! All the drugs came in and we went and met with a RN to get instructions about how to administer all the shots and meds. Nate was going to be the one giving them all to me! Yikes, but he did an amazing job and was extremely patient...especially when I had to get my first big one in my hip/butt (intra muscular) and wouldn't let him actually poke me for about 15 minutes! So after 6 long weeks of shots and meds the week had finally arrived for us to go in and check the size of my eggs in preparation for retrieval. We started Monday, not ready. Tuesday, not ready. Wednesday, not ready. Thursday, not ready. Friday, this was the day, it had to be. They had told us the eggs never took longer then this. Friday morning we were so thrilled! We went to our appointment, were anxiously looking at the ultra sound, and then heard the devastating news. "I think we're going to have to cancel your cycle. There aren't enough developed eggs." WHAT! We never even thought this was a possibility. Devastation sank in and Nate and I were both broken. All this time, all the shots (Nate had given me around 70 shots) all the excitement. It felt like our world had just fallen apart. We went home and after a few days were able to pull ourselves together. With faith, and the power of prayer. With one another and my Savior. With family support. We survived. Eight long weeks later, we were back to square one and starting the meds and first shots all over again. Six weeks later, my eggs were looking good and ready for retrieval! We were thrilled to get news they retrieved 15 eggs! Enough to use and enough to cryo-preserve (freeze.) Things were finally going our way! Five days later the embryologist called and only 6 had made it through fertilization and were developing. That's okay, we still have 6, right? The day we went in for our transfer we were hit with the news that only 1 of the fertilized eggs actually made it to the ideal stage of development-blastocycst. Of course there had to be bad news to put a damper on our good day. Two eggs were still transferred; the 1 'ideal' egg, and the other with roughly a 30% chance. The waiting game began. I must say, those were the longest 2 weeks of my life. We waited, dreamed of what it would be like if I was pregnant and dreaded what would happen if I wasn't. I'm so grateful for Nate, he truly is an amazing man. We found peace and comfort in prayer and temple attendance. The day was finally here! February 1st 2009, super bowl Sunday, early morning, we were getting my blood drawn. The feelings we were experiencing, the excitement and doubt. The "what if's." What a painful 3 hours of waiting for those results! Finally my phone rang, I think the neighbors may have been able to hear my heart beat if they listened close enough,

"Is this Lindsey?" asked the RN.

"Yes."

"Are you driving?"

"No."

"You're sure, we can't be responsible for any accidents..."

"I'm sure."

"Well CONGRATULATIONS! You're pregnant!" I felt like someone had wrapped me up in a whirl wind and I was flying and whirling through the air. Nate and I embraced and cried and laughed and cried some more. We were finally here, and it was surreal. We were definitely on cloud 9, and to be honest, I think we still are. This baby girl is truly our little Miracle.

Go Whiteboy

This is a classic, you've probably seen it, but it never gets old!